Fellowship Of Young Christian Widows-Widowers

              WALKING ALONGSIDE OF YOUNG WIDOWS/WIDOWERS.............OFFERING HOPE AND ENCOURAGEMENT

                                                            

 

 

Home
Contents
Dedication
The New Journey
The Finest Roses
Meltdown!
Experiencing Loss
Victims Of Cruelty
It's Not Fair
Single Parenting
Dealing With Guilt
Beanbag Adventure
It Is Well
Turning A Page
Newsletters
Keeping Memories
Getting Acquainted
Questions & Answers
Resource Page
Contact Us
Statement of Faith
Reprint Information
Privacy Policy
New Page 11
 

 

MELTDOWN!         

 

Tears are never wasted.  Through them we draw closer to our God who now holds in his arms the ones we love.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Webster’s definition:

Meltdown (melt’down) the accidental melting of uranium pellets and/or the rods that contain them, with the risk of releasing immense amounts of radiation

 

 

 

FOYCWW’s definition:                 

Meltdown (melllltdooowwnnn) a sudden and unplanned breakage of the shell placed around a broken heart, with benefits of releasing immense amounts of pain and grief; pertaining to when grief no longer has words. 

 

 

A Volcano of Emotions 

Kristy sat in the middle of her front room sobbing uncontrollably.  The volcano of emotions erupting from within her would have caused those passing by to wonder what horrible tragedy had struck Kristy’s life.  The cake decorating kit was nowhere to be found!  Kristy had searched every imaginable place in her kitchen and the kit had simply disappeared.  With little hope of finding it she sank to the floor in the front room and the meltdown began.  The inquisitive eyes of her children peered at her from corners of the room.  This meltdown was not about cake decorating, and it wasn’t about cluttered cabinets that hid kitchen utensils.  It was about a mom who was trying to carry on with family birthday traditions just weeks after losing her husband.

 

 

 Bouquet of Tears

Nicholas watched as the florist van pulled in the driveway. A young man stepped out with a huge bouquet of beautiful flowers.  It didn’t take Nicholas long to figure out the flowers were for his mommy’s birthday. With great excitement Nicholas followed the man to the front door anticipating what a wonderful reaction his mommy would have when she saw such a floral display.  Nicholas’ little legs beat his mommy to the dinning room table where she carefully placed the large ribbon strewn vase.   His eyes were glued to his mommy’s eyes as she carefully opened the card that revealed the giver of the beautiful gift.  He anticipated that his mommy would quickly lean over and swoop him into her arms and share the beauty of the moment.  Nicholas was not prepared for the puddle of tears that consumed his mommy and caused her to grab the dinning room table to support the weight of her anguish.  Roses, daisies and baby’s breath had nothing to do with the flood of tears.  Spending the first birthday alone without her husband was what this meltdown was all about. 

 

At the death of a beloved friend, Jesus wept---openly, unashamedly, boldly wept.  As the songwriter Gordon Jensen wrote, “God sees the tears of a broken-hearted soul.  Tears are a language God understands. “

A Meltdown of Tigerific Force                 

Jenny’s 8th birthday was rapidly approaching.  Her mom was having a difficult time thinking of a special gift for her.  One day while driving past a pet store, the thought occurred to Jenny’s mom that a kitten might be just the thing to nestle in the empty void that was left in Jenny’s tender heart after the death of her daddy.   

Kittens are like zucchini!  During the summer months you can’t find enough consumers to equal the population of zucchini.  It’s either feast or famine when it comes to zucchini.  Kittens are much the same.  We are forever turning down offers of black, yellow, and grey felines.  However, if you’ve ever decided that your child actually needs a kitten, you may have to search high and low to find one of the small cuddly balls of fur.

As in many situations in our life when we are left wondering how to deliver either good or bad news, Jenny’s mom sought help from Hallmark.  Right there in the middle of the card rack was the cheerfully colored answer to her dilemma!  “Congratulations on Your New Kitten,” the card said! 

Jenny opened a few small gifts before being given the card.  It did not take long for her to figure out that the card was an announcement of future happiness in the fuzziest of forms.  Tears welled up in her eyes and she began to cry tears of joy.  Visions of kittens danced in her head.  It was the best gift she could have ever imagined.

There were important issues to discuss.  Decisions needed to be made regarding the specifics of such a delightful gift.  The family already owned a grey cat and a black dog.  It was decided that the search would begin for a yellow tabby which would, of course, be named Tiger.  A pet shop, conveniently located on the route home, had two grey striped kittens, but the decision was made to wait for a yellow Tiger.  Jenny’s mom was dismayed to find her young daughter crying one afternoon.  “They are tears of happiness,” Jenny said as she explained the anticipation of such a wonderful gift brought the tears to her eyes.

One day Jenny wanted to be reminded of the reality of her much anticipated feline fancy, and asked her mom if they could stop and look at the two grey striped kittens at the pet store.  Upon inquiring about the two kittens the sales clerk told the young girl that both kittens had been sold, but another cat had just come in and they were welcome to take a look at it.  The sales clerk said it wasn’t a grey striped pussy, but an ordinary yellow tabby.  Jenny’s pleading eyes focused on her mother as she reminded her mom that the yellow tabby was just what she had been waiting for.  The tiny yellow Tiger cuddled up in her arms and the hole in Jenny’s heart was warmed by fuzzy yellow fur. 

 The tiny yellow Tiger quickly wormed its way into everyone’s heart.  Tiger was blessed with a wonderful personality and was every family’s dream of a perfectly behaved house cat. 

One night a week after Tiger was welcomed into the family, Jenny crawled into bed and awaited her mom’s goodnight kisses.  The warmth of the kisses and the sweetness of the goodnight prayer left both mom and daughter in a peaceful place.  As Jenny’s mom placed the final goodnight kiss on her young daughter’s forehead and stepped back from Jenny’s bed, the horrifying sensation of a small yellow frame being crushed under foot became reality.  Attempting to move quickly off the fragile little feline, Jenny’s mom maneuvered her feet in a swift fashion, only to land a second time on the unpredictably moving object.  With swift movement Jenny’s mom swooped up the injured animal and ran towards the laundry room to evaluate the seriousness of the tragic accident.  It became quickly visible that the tiny lifeless body was going to quickly move from being a heart warmer to being a heart breaker. 

That’s when it happened.  Right there in front of the inquiring eyes of her children, Jenny’s mom had a meltdown.  She stumbled upstairs to her son’s room, her sorrow pouring out, forcing her to mold her body to the wall for support.   Her son responded without words, running out of the room to find the source of his mother’s anguish.  With the sounds of Jenny’s mom’s meltdown, Jenny’s sobs were barely audible.  Wrapped up in one another’s arms the family cried together. 

As Jenny’s mom sat on my couch relating the sad story.  her heart ached for Jenny’s loss.  She mentioned that it was only a cat, and in no way could be compared with the death of Jenny’s daddy, so why did she have a meltdown of such Tigerific force? 

 

 

 

 

 

Meltdowns!  Most of us have had them at one time or another.  They come at the most unpredictable times causing an avalanche of emotions that consume every ounce of our being.  At the time they happen they appear to have little to do with the death of our spouse, but inside our broken hearts hides a plethora of grief that awaits a trigger that will temporarily render us incapable of seeing the rainbow waiting to emerge after our flood of tears. 

 

 

 

Psalm 119:143-145 reminds us that “Trouble and anguish have taken hold on me: yet thy commandments are my delights.  The righteousness of thy testimonies is everlasting: give me understanding, and I shall live.  I cried with my whole heart; hear me, O Lord:  I will keep thy statutes.”

Meltdowns are evidence of our humanity.  We are frail and must take hold of the Lord and delight in his commandments.  When we can no longer find words to cry out to our Father, He will hear our tears. 

 

 

 

 

God knows we will cry, but he wants us to know that tears are only borrowed.  One day He will take them all away. 

 

 
 

 

Home ]Copyright © 2001  [Fellowship Of Young Christian Widows/ Widowers]. All rights reserved.
Revised: 10/25/04.

Last modified: 10/25/04